Not very far from where you live, there live a mommy monster and a daddy monster in a village of monsters in Mongolia. Of course, it is the humans that call them monsters; they call themselves supermen, superwomen, flogs (flying dogs), fligs (flying pigs), and so on.
The mom and dad monsters have a monster kid named Cushy Bushy Monster (CBM for short). He is really strong; so strong that he could lift up a monster truck with his fingers when he was just 1 year old! He is now 6 monster years old, and who knows what he can lift up! Like most other monsters he has two horns, messy hair, a stubby nose, a big mouth, round eyes, and two long ears. Oh, do you know why his mom named him Cushy Bushy? Bushy because he had bushy, bushy hair on his head and a little bushy tail behind; Cushy because he was mostly happy and cuddly, which is called Cushy in monster language. He is a bit short, quite short in fact, and chubby. But don’t tell him that if you want to be his friend.
But CBM is also different from other monsters. See, monsters are very simple creatures: they like to scare little kids, eat a lot of junk food, snore in their sleep, and stay awfully dirty. CBM did all of this, but he acted different. First, CBM was a curious monster and bothered his mom and dad with questions all the time: “why is the moon like cheese and not chicken?” “is there life outside of Mongolia?” And, when dad took him to people towns to teach him how to scare kids, he would ask “why do human kids not have horns?” “are we there yet?” In that sense, he is not that different from you, the human kid reading this story.
The most important thing to remember about CBM is that he is mostly nice, but sometimes naughty. When he is nice, he is nice like a friend, cuddly, huggly, sharing presents with you, and so on. When he is naughty, oh boy, he can be very naughty and mischievous, and he can scare anyone with his growls.
Let me share with you the one sure way to make him nice from naughty: give him Carrots, Milk, and Lots of Cushy Bushy Cookies. Simple!
Cushy Bushy Monster has his own pet flog (remember the flying dog?) like every other monster kid in town. He named it Cushy Bushy Frog, or Froggy for short. Froggy is a bull-dog with butterfly wings. He looks normal, just like other flogs - with a bushy tail, big tummy like CBM, rainbow wings, and stubby monster horns. Are you wondering why he called it a Frog and not a Flog? Well, when CBM was little, he mixed up his R’s and L’s – monster became monstel, floggy became froggy.
Froggy likes to scare CBM for fun and does it very well. Of course, CBM will not admit this to anyone. You see, CBM has always been scared of the dark (which is somewhat sad for a monster, if you think about it) and Froggy knows that. So it always jumps on CBM when he walks into the dark.
So, here’s what you need to know if you want CBM to be your friend:
1. Don’t tell him that he is scared of Froggy or the darkness.
2. Don’t call him short or stubby or fat or chubby. You can tell him that he is smart and strong – he likes that.
3. But, most and most of all, it’s a well known fact that, if you give him carrots, milk, and a whole lot of Cushy Bushy Cookies, he will be your friend forever (at least as long as you continue to give him those things).
Cushy Bushy Cookies
If you’re worried about where you can buy Cushy Bushy Cookies, don’t bother asking your mom. Moms don’t know this most important secret. Cushy Bushy Cookies are made like normal cookies (with lots of sugar, brown flour, and love, all baked inside a hot oven), but with one difference: You – who wants to be CBM’s friend – get to add your own favorite thing into the cookie, like chocolates, gummy bears, fruit loops, M&Ms, chicken bites, or lollipops- anything you want.